You can find a lot of weird stuff scavenging the armpits of the internet. Some of it can be gold, but in all honesty, most of it is shit. This might fall under a new category called “shitty gold”. I was looking at a DJ forum when out of nowhere a youtube video started playing. It was this really awkward looking guy talking about learning how to quickly become a DJ. As I started scrolling up and down the page trying to put an end to the dreck spewing out his mouth, I slowed down and started listening so in a way his marketing actually worked. Or did it? Once I found the video and started watching, I noticed he was coming off as one of those late night paid advertisement ads as he was telling you how to learn how to DJ. For a local DJ hack like myself who put in 12 years behind the tables, I couldn’t believe how stupid and out of touch this guy sounded. Keep in mind, he is marketing to someone who wants to become a DJ and doesn’t know where to start. Somehow if you jump on board with this dude you’ll be DJing in no time and living a Ric Flair lifestyle. Wooooo! Lets check the video and yes, 2:13 is when I fuckin died. “Skuss Skuss”
I was blown away by the size of this dudes clown shoes trying to pass this off as legit. For someone giving “tutorials” on how to DJ and especially how to market yourself as one, I figure I would be able to recognize the guy but I’ve never seen or heard of him. Before I pass any judgement on him, I decided to do some further research before putting my Jordan in his ass.
He has a website DJ Sean Gallager, which is this Geocities style template with a bunch of hella corny promo pics. They could have been on our Corny DJ promo shoot post. 
Other than that, it’s just pictures of him with different headliners. No flyers or anything. Now I’m not saying the dude isn’t a DJ, but all this looks suspect. Then I looked at some of his other videos and his stench of shady grew even more. Here is a quick video he did called “DJ Lifestyle” DOUCHE CHILL 5000.
The fuck did I just watch? At this point it’s a laugher so now the only way to find this dudes hustle is to pretend I’m one of the poor bastards who is looking to get into DJing and thinking this is legit. 
First thing I did was go to his website to enter my email address that he was asking for in the video. I clicked the privacy policy link to make sure he doesn’t sell my email address to anyone and that link to that was dead. So from a fake email account I signed up for it. Since then, that inbox has been BLOWN UP with spam and junk mail. Like any good drug dealer, he sends you a couple basic ass tutorials that are no different than anything you can find on youtube. Then the more links you click, the faster he takes you down this yellow brick road of disappointment. At last, once the tutorials were over he gave me a link to all his top secret DJ techniques and marketing tips but it lead to this. 
Sweet victory! I knew this dude was full of shit. Another video I found of his that also tipped me off is he does a bunch of youtube business tutorials on how to get rich quick. So what I’m going to do is tell anyone out there who is looking to DJ, a quick HOR tutorial guide on how to start off as a “DJ”. Free of fucking charge
1. Be humble, don’t be a dick
2. Practice - Lock yourself in a room for 6 months. If you have the basics down by then congratulations, you made your first step in the right direction. If not, congratulations, you were meant to be a club promoter.
3. Music production -If you make your own music, the sky’s the limit, if you don’t the limit is the sky.
4. See number 1 again
That pretty much sums it up. Not really saving any existing DJ’s from getting this because anyone with a smart bone in their body knows this video is clown shit. Just in case for the 1% out there, hopefully this post will save you and for the older heads out there, I think this dude reminded me of Don Lapree. he use to sell shitty paid advertisements back in the 90′s if you remember him.
