“So you smoke some stuff from California, we all do. You think of yourself as a
savvy connoisseur, Chemdawg 91, Girl Scout Cookies? How important is your
Sovereignty, Toro, or Volcano? You have dabs. I don’t care.
What ever happened to homegrown? Why is that not important to you? The
coolest vape in the world doesn’t help when the buds aren’t flushed. Do you
know what spidermites are?”
Today we’ll talk to someone from the Square Grouper days, an older gentleman I
met along the way. We can call him Zee. He is a wealth of knowledge; he’s a pretty
cool guy.
Young GrassProper: Do you mind if I title this OG Edition? A kush pun if you will.
Zee: Old Granny? Sure. Lesson 1: Ocean Grown Kush, not Original Gangster.
Young GrassProper: Interesting…speaking of ocean grown, would you mind telling
me that story again? You know, about the square grouper days?
Zee: Alright. So back in the 70’s I played pro ball. Won’t tell you what sport
or what position, but I was good. I lived in the south during off-season and
started buying up all the Oaxaca, Panama, and Colombian grass I could afford.
When I couldn’t afford it, you could go down to these little coves, and find
50lb sacks, like they find now I guess. Those weren’t bad days either.
Young GrassProper: Would you smoke that?
Zee: How long have you known me? Next question.
Young GrassProper: So what is your relationship with cannabis like now?
Zee: I love to grow it. I love nothing more. I don’t grow to sell; I grow for my
family and myself. I want to control what I put into my body. Sound like a
hippie sure, but getting older it’s important. I enjoy edibles a lot, Grandpa like
his cookies. As a matter of fact, check the cabinet.
Young GrassProper: You control what you put in your body. Is it organic?
Zee: Absolutely. I have tried all the organic nutrient mixes coming out of
Cali, some of them are good. I still like to blend nutrient tea for my garden.
I am never happy with my work; always want to be better, so I am always
tinkering.
Young GrassProper: What type of medium do you use?
Zee: I’ve tried hydro tables, and plenty of soils. Even those fancy air pot root
things. I use coco coir, sometimes blend with rockwool. The good shit. Lights
are HPS.
Young GrassProper: Do you have any other cool stories? I can’t think, this cookie is
kicking my ass.
Zee: I told ya I was in pro ball. A few years back I got a call from someone I
used to play with, we smoke from time to time and reminisce about the old
days. His kid was a coach of a pro sports team that happened to be in town
for the weekend. He tells me the kid’s players were insisting on the best herb
in the city. He realized he was in Uncle Zee’s town, so he called me. I’m calling
you.
Young GrassProper: Did you help out? What team was it?
Zee: I can’t tell you which team, but it was recent. I packed up a few jars, and
a few dozen cookies. Headed down to the stadium, kid was waiting for me
with a guest badge. Nobody was gonna search my old ass at the stadium.
Young GrassProper: That’s pretty damn awesome. No team I get, how about what
sport? Come on Zee, I roll you another joint, I know your hands hurt.
Zee: Football… don’t make fun of me boy, this old thumb may not bend
easy but it’s greener than that clone you’re trying to root. Just use the
cloner…don’t forget the gel.
Young GrassProper: So do you have any old school clones in your stable?
Zee: Nope. I’m old, but I’m hip. I like the clone only strains from Cali, but I
like to breed, I’m addicted to the seed banks. Amsterdam, Spain, BC…I order a
lot of seeds. Sometimes I’ll keep a strain around for a while, never more than
2 years. I only have 5 tents scattered through out the house. Not all of those
are for blooming. I have more seeds than I’ll ever be able to grow.
Young GrassProper: What do you smoke out of?
Zee: I like to roll joints. I don’t have much time left, switching to a vaporizer
at this point in the game is pointless. I do have a few bongs that are older
than you are that I have taken off some friends over the years. Never use
those. All I really need is a grinder.
Young GrassProper: It’s been a pleasure smoking with you as always Zee, what
have we smoked today anyways?
Zee: Whatever those 10 jars say, sometimes I get the lids mixed up. I’m older
than hell and I’m stoned all damn day, cut me some slack.
Young GrassProper: I can’t thank you enough for the parting gift…
Zee: Come back in a few months, tell me how you did. Then maybe I’ll really
teach you.
Young GrassProper: That would be awesome.
Zee: Remember kid, earwax is cool, but where’s the King Hassan?
Dispensaries are great, but who did they get it from? That’s what I want to
convey to you…
Zee would not allow any pictures of his finished product, garden, or smoking tools. He
lives a very secluded life for good reason. I will say this, when you get to smoke with a
legend, ask questions, roll more joints, and listen.

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